Friday, July 19, 2019

Soon To Be ...


In few days, I won't be here
I mean, I'll join the training
For commissioning after three years being cadet officer
I am so excited yet so nervous
There's so many things I've been thinking lately
Regarding this event and almost everything

Being a cadet officer was my very own decision
Well, people said, "to be or not to be"
You choose, right?
So I chose to be a cadet officer not long after I entered university
Actually I was tempted by the allowance that they promised
Ka-ching! Ka-ching! Ka-ching baby!
Little did I know, bloods, sweats and tears are the foundation of that "ka-ching"
Also, I were too lazy to join any other extra co-curricular activities in order to fight for college residence like thousands of students in my university
I don't mind the distance of my college that absurdly far from my faculty
As long as it was walking distance to shopping mall nearby
And if you imagine I'm spending my weekend by hanging out with my friends at that particular shopping mall
You are not wrong, but partly, yes

I spent my weekends very well
With waking up as early as 0430H in the morning
Getting ready in line before our seniors does
Getting punishments for something that too small for normal people to care
God! I swear, during that time, it was really hell
I hated everyone and whatever they did
I told myself that they are so wrong in so many levels
But some part of me, trying to calm me down
And keep on telling me, "this too shall pass", "one day you will miss all of this"
That's what keeping me going strong
I'd be lying if I said it was smooth journey all the way up until now
No, it was bumpy and very rocky road, I tell you
There's time, I almost gave myself up
Because from what I see, people never listen to me
Like I don't even exist

And there's my falling time
I were struggling to keep up with the rest of us
I personally really want to thank Nor Hafizah Busman for whatever she did when I was trying to get back after my failing moment
She was the on who accompanied me to that place
We were walking and with no umbrella, we just don't care
I almost lost my way but she was there
God bless her for whatever she did to me


to be continued


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